Lou's Got the Flu
by YamiTami
Summary: Hal and Dave are waging a war with each other. Their weapons are an anime playlist and singing in the shower. //rated for a second of nude Snake//


**Since people are still interested in my fics over here and FFN has fixed a couple (but not near all) of the issues it's been having, I'll start posting my stories here again. This is really against my better judgment and if they screw up so that dashes disappear or the ads somehow get more annoying, then I'm not coming back. It's bad enough they still don't allow tildies for no apparent reason.**

**I'm posting this in chapter one of all my stories so everyone knows where I can be found. See my profile for the link to my homepage.**

-----------------------------------

Otacon sat at his desk with his head propped up on his left hand while his right was at the mouse. He tiredly clicked through his music folders in search for some songs he hadn't listened to lately; the piece of encryption he was working on was being exceptionally difficult. He was almost finished after a _week_, but he needed a pick up if he was going to finish before he passed out. He loved programming, but some things...

He absently wondered if the 'click and drag' motion was going to give him carpal tunnel before the typing.

_Hmmm... Dragonhalf, always... Mario... 'Ball of Magically Adhesive Garbage'... what else is hyper? All Your Base, Over 300, Gackt is required... aaaaand some generic rave tracks to finish things out._

He scrolled through the list and weeded out a few of the slower songs before cranking up the volume and hitting play. He leaned back and gulped down some lukewarm coffee, wishing that they could afford the room for some speakers. His somewhat battered laptop's max volume was high enough to be considered loud, but he couldn't blast it like he wanted to.

The classic Mario theme came up first. After allowing himself a moment of nostalgia for younger days and his long gone SuperNintendo, he got back to work. Before long he was completely lost in the lines of code and the beat of the music, the J-Pop assisted lack of awareness helping him get through the problem a little bit faster. He always worked faster with a solid beat in his ears, and while he would have preferred it to be loud enough to make his bones rattle he still got through it.

Hal was still engaged in the cleanup process when he was broken out of his trance by the sound of running water. He glanced up at the wall in front of him with a small frown. Due to some shoddy remodeling on the apartment of the week, the wall separating Hal's room and the bathroom transmitted sound like _air_. This wouldn't usually be a problem as Hal phased everything out when he was into something and rushing water was an easy background noise to live with. However, the shower going meant that David was done with his exercises. The wall between Hal's room and the living/training room was exceedingly thick due to the stupidity of the remodeling crew, but now that his partner was in the bathroom...

Just as the opening 'doo doo doo's of the main Katamari theme started up, Dave let loose.

**Lou's got the flu and he's laid up**

**Laid up, laid up**

**Lou's got the flu and he's laid up**

**Have to get well pretty soon though**

_Not this again..._

_**A dangalang, dingalang, digadang doing**_

Hal winced at the off key singing and then glared at the wall. Dave's voice wasn't exactly honey-smooth, but the hacker _knew_ the man could carry a tune properly. Hitting the wrong notes was just another strategic tactic the soldier employed in their little musical war. Hal's Japanland folders versus the old 'talking songs' that Dave seemed to favor.

_Two can play at that game..._ Hal thought irritably as he quickly finished his work, saved, and then turned his laptop so the speakers were facing the shower. Dave's volume and intentional tonedeafness increased on the first verse.

**Not enough water puts thirst in a man**

**Just enough water puts joy in his land--**

Hal grabbed his internet-safe laptop and opened up a search page, keying in the nonsensical flu and water references so he could discover who was responsible for the travesty being inflicted upon him.

_And he says my anime themes don't make any sense... I mean, okay, Dragonhalf, but most of the others make more sense that this!_

**But too much water will overflooooow**

**And tear the man's land up, so there ya go**

Hal moved the hacking-laptop a little closer to the wall while he clicked on some results with the other hand. Dave took a blissful pause before launching into the supposed chorus about Lou's flu again. While he was at that Hal skimmed the lyrics and moved on to hitting some related links.

There was the dull thump of a shampoo bottle being dropped to the floor of the tub, and Hal imagined that Dave was standing facing the spray, hands buried in his hair and his head thrown back.

The image was _almost_ enough to make Hal feel less annoyed.

**Some people bad and some people good**

**Too bad the bad can't be like the good--**

Hal's nigh frantic clicking paused, partially from catching sight of the song title 'You Can't Rollerskate in a Buffalo Herd,' partially from his mind running away to overanalyze that particular verse and how true it was.

_It really is too bad... god knows things would be easier on us if some of the enemies defected..._ Hal cocked his head to the side and listened.

**But everything changes a little and it should--**

That brought a smile to the programmer's face. _Things have changed for the both of us, and, Metal Gear aside, I think it's for the better._

**Good ain't forever and bad ain't for good**

_Heh, _Hal thought with a different kind of grin, _Dave's still... 'bad,' but he doesn't grab my collar anymore... well, so long as I don't drink all the coffee before he gets to it..._

Another chorus, complete with the mock-guitar at the end being sung loud enough to rattle the windows, and Hal mused that Dave might have had a nice voice before years of smoking and hard liquor turned it gravely.

Hal brought the lyrics back up for further study, trying and failing to fight the warm blush off his face.

_His rough voice can be... nice, when he's not putting up his front for other people, when it's just us and he's being friendly... mmm, very nice..._

**I've got sugar in my candy and sugar in my soup**

**I'm getting sick from the candy and fat from the soup**

**True love's sweet, but if it's mishandled**

**The bitter wind blows and out goes your candle**

Hal was already lost in picking apart Roger Miller's songs as they applied to their situation, falling back into his unresponsive haze. Thus, he didn't notice when his playlist ran out in the middle of Dave's next chorus, or the fact that Dave didn't finish the chorus once the J-Pop died out. The hacker remained glued to his screen and blissfully unaware until he heard the slight click of a laptop being closed. His fierce possesivness for his computers, and what lay on their harddrives, snapped him out of it just in time to see Dave withdraw his hand from the cover of his hacking-laptop.

Given the soldier's position of leaning over the desk and the fact he was wearing nothing but a _towel_, Hal found himself face to face with the muscles of Dave's chest. Trying very, _very_ hard not to let his gaze wander down to the towel that hung almost indecently loose on the mercenary's hips, Hal put on an annoyed expression and glared up at his partner. The effect was somewhat lost as he was unsuccessful in briefly tracing the line of the other man's 'happy trail' with his eyes and imagining what it would be like to do that with his tongue.

_Smooth, real smooth. He's never going to notice what kind of effect he has on me, definitely.,, GYAH, why does he have to walk around half naked all the time?_

David was clearly unaffected by Hal's glare; he just nudged the programmer's chair back with his knee before examining the open windows on the internet-laptop. He cocked an eyebrow at the lyrics displayed on the screen while Hal blushed furiously and eyed the sliver of thigh that became visible when he was moved.

"I turned the volume down on the other one."

Hal had to suppress a _shiver_ at the 'nice' quality in that gravely voice. He stopped staring at Dave's legs and saw that he was clicking out of his browser pages, after making sure they weren't anything other than lyrics, before shutting the lid on the second laptop. The hacking-laptop had subroutines that automatically saved and closed everything when the lid was closed, for security, but the internet-laptop was far more ordinary in that things might be lost. Of course, it seemed like the mercenary still wasn't listening when Hal explained 'stand by' for the dozenth time. Still, it warmed Hal's heart to think that his partner cared enough to confirm a window's uselessness before shutting down the computer...

_Wait... _Hal blinked as the information trickled through, _why is Dave shutting down my computers...?_

Hal got his answer a few seconds later when the soldier closed his internet-laptop and was instantly behind the hacker's chair, sliding a calloused hand down the other man's arm. Hal couldn't stop the hitch in his breath caused by the still-unfamiliar intimate contact; they'd fallen for each other fast and hard, but the physical he was still learning.

_Still so damn shy. Oh, but he isn't,_ he thought as the soldier leaned down. There was the sound of a towel sliding to the floor and Hal gulped. _He isn't shy about it at all..._

His eyes fluttered shut when he felt hot breath on his ear and neck, his heart following suit as both hands settled on his stomach.

"Finish the code...?" came the soft, rumbling whisper. Hal caught his lower lip between his teeth and nodded, not trusting his voice when Davis was so close.

Dave made a sound as closed that he got to pleased outside of orgasm, and with a soft smile kissed his partner's hair. His hands traveled lower and Hal arched into the back of the chair, wishing he was pressed against the soldier's naked chest instead. Dave knelt and started rubbing the other man's thighs.

"Mmph... Dave...?"

David's idea of an answer was to nip at Hal's neck and then settle in to lick and kiss the pink mark pinker. As if to prove that he could think through _anything_, the hacker continued.

"Isn't this... mmn... 'mishandling?'"

The hands and mouth stilled for a moment before that rich, rare laugh filled the room. Dave kneeled down and spun the chair around so the two men were facing each other. Hal's eyes traveled down the soldier's nude form, still with the blush but with a growing hunger. Dave put a hand on each of Hal's knees and grinned.

"So... does that mean you like my music?"

Hal glared as effectively as he could with his naked partner kneeling in front of him before deciding that he had been defeated.

"Okay, fine..." he said with a sigh. "Just stop singing off key..."

Dave grinned and pulled Hal down on top of him.


End file.
